What is Your Pace of Life?

What is Your Pace of Life?

Learning to slow down use to be a challenge for me, slowing down meant I had to stop and think about all the things in my life I did not like.  I had to deal with Lucas continually being in harm’s way.  I had to worry about my daughter’s health issues.  I had a job I hated.  I did not live where I wanted too.  I felt like I was stuck on hold.  When I stopped moving I had to accept that I did not have control over all the things I wanted too.  

This was great technique to put all the things I hated about my life in a box I could hide under a bed.  The bad part is it came out in other ways.  I was continually stressed because I never took the time to relax.  When I did stop to take a break I found myself in the fridge stuffing food in my face or drinking enough wine to numb myself for the next 6 months.  

This was no way to live.  I was always tired, sick and strung out from stress.  After a few scary health issues I looked at where my life was out of balance.  Pace of life was screaming for a slowdown.  At first slowing down was not easy.  I had to think about those uncomfortable feelings I did not like to deal with.  It took a lot of courage to let these thoughts come to mind.  In a few days of really working at it I found the benefits were more than worth the few minutes of being uncomfortable.

I learned I could deal better with those feelings when I faced them rather than stuffed them down.  Through meditation I learned to change what I could control.  I started taking wellness classes to have a career I love rather than sitting at job I hate.    I started taking better care of my daughter’s health and my own because I cooked healthier meals.  An added bonus is my daughter’s health improved dramatically because she learned how to slow down and relax from me.  She was able to express her fear of hospitals and dying.  In return I was able to reassure her about some of her fears that she kept bottled up. 

I have accepted that Lucas is patriot before anything else.  I knew that when I met him years ago.  I have to admit that is one of the reasons I fell in love with him.  I know he loves me and his family – that is motivation for keeping us safe.  If he were to change he would not be the same man I fell in love with.  I still am not happy about living in snow country, but; the alternative is living in a warm climate without the support of family when Lucas is away.  I tried doing that in the past when I lived in NC.  It wasn’t easy; I am not willing to go through that while my daughter is still very young.   In a few years when she is older, it will be easier for us to live farther away from family.  

Life is not perfect.  I have to keep myself in check.  It would be very easy to run from here to there without thinking when I encounter situations I do not want to deal with.  Moving at the speed of light was my coping mechanism for many years; it can be easy to fall into old habits.   I have found my vigilance pays off with inner peace.  

Some of my tips for slowing down are:

Meditation

Walking outside no matter the weather – really pay attention to nature, the sounds, smell, and sights.  There is nothing more beautiful than Mother Nature.

Go to yoga

Watch a silly movie

Listen to music

Take a nap

Get a massage

Read a book

Take a shower

Do nothing

Cook a healthy dinner

Play with your kids

Dance

Find your own way of slowing down to enjoy life.